Crack Baby X-Men: Planet Succ

Planet Succ is the first story arc in the Crack Baby X-Men saga.

It begins by chronologically revealing the origin stories of the first six Crack Babies, Unnamed Crack Baby 1, Heroin Boy, Macaroni Boy, Fish Lad, Gay Boy, and Shit. All of their origin stories culminate to one event, the introduction of Jerk Man. He entered the Crack Shack after all of the previously introduced Crack Babies had gathered, and proceeded to jerkify Gay Boy, killing him in the process. This gives the Crack Babies motivation to resist against Jerk Man. Shit flings his feces at Jerk Man and is able to scare him away, protecting the Crack Babies from further casualties. Outside of the Crack Shack, Jerk Man meets Piss. Piss promptly introduces himself, and then says his signature catchphrase, "I have to piss." Piss then proceeds to urinate on Jerk Man. Jerk Man is at first disgusted by this action, but as he begins to realize that the stream of urine is neverending he realizes that he must stop it to save the world. Jerk Man begins to jerkify Piss's urine stream, and thus the two forces canceled out. In the end, Jerk Man was the hero and Piss turned out to be the real villain, but really they were both just victims of internalized systematic oppression.

Planet Succ was originally scheduled to release on Sept. 12, 2001, but was pushed to a later date due to sensitive plane crash related content and the publishers not wanting any sort of 9/11 controversy. Though four subsequent story arcs have been released since then, Planet Succ has still not been officially released to the public.